Katy Faust is an American who was “raised by lesbians” and is against same-sex marriage. She is a fundamentalist Christian and runs a website called askthebigot.com. She is currently in Australia promoting the cause for traditional marriage and will be on Q&A tomorrow night.
But it’s important to know that Katy was raised as a child in a traditional mum & dad family, until her parents divorced when she was nine. The divorce was “the most traumatic event in my thirty-eight years of life.” Her mum then met another woman, and they both continued to raise Katy. Her step-mum seems to have done a great job, and is someone who Katy “truly loves and respects”.
How terrible to have gone through a family breakup at such a young age. But this experience doesn’t mean same-sex marriage is a bad, it means that family breakups are bad. I doubt she would have the views she does if she was raised by her lesbian parents from birth, and if she never went through that terrible divorce.
Tom & Alice have been raised by two dads from day one … daddy and papa are their parents and love them and are there for them. It’s just their normal. Katy on the other hand was raised by a mum and dad, then went through a breakup that was traumatic and had to get accustomed to her mum now having a female partner. That really changes things.
It wasn’t same-sex marriage that caused Katy’s trauma, it was the fact the parents that she loved broke up.
That’s where Katy and I should be on the same page; that what makes happy and well rounded children is a stable and loving family environment. When marriages breakdown, often it is the children who suffer. Marriage helps create a more solid commitment between couples, and that’s a good thing.
For our family situation to be like Katy’s, then Ralph and I would have to break up in a few years. It doesn’t matter that Ralph and I are both guys, I’m sure it would still be difficult for the children. And if one of us then got married to a woman, then I’m sure our children would look at the situation in a similar light to Katy. “What’s going on here?” “Who is this woman?” “Why aren’t my dads still together?”
And most importantly they might think, “This new person is not able to do the same job that my other dad was doing. They just can’t.”
If there’s anything we should all be against, it’s unhappy couples having children. Because happy, committed family units that stay together tend to raise great kids, irrespective of the gender of the parents.
(As an aside, who calls their website AskTheBigot anyway? And why are we giving an American airtime on this debate? Who asked her to come and speak here? And why don’t we have any Australian voices with real life experience on this topic on this Q&A program?)